I recently returned from a vision fast. I spent 4 days fasting alone in the wild, supported on either end by integration with a spectacular group of men. I brought only a journal—no books, ipad, camera, or other things to “do.” I brought a tarp, and I used it to find shelter in a cave twenty feet off the ground when it rained. The purpose of this adventure was to find greater clarity in my life’s purpose: I wanted to initiate my egoic ability to function in the world in to the service of my soul. This all appears rather dramatic, and it is indeed a story with personal potency. Yet, the drama of what took place for me is far less important than the simplicity of listening to our shared live earth. I have been initiated in my service to Gaia.

Gaia is the idea and name of the earth as a whole living organism. We are part of this living system that the word “Gaia” represents. When I make meaning of something I experience, then that meaning exists in Gaia because I exist in Gaia. And, Gaia is so much bigger than I am. Cultures more attuned to the language of nature take this for granted, I think, while for me it’s a gentle revelation. I learned lessons from Rattlesnake, listened to rhythms expressed by Rain, and spoke with numerous characters I saw in the rocks of Idaho’s Little City of Rocks Wilderness Study Area.

Movement is a constant in living systems. It is how we gather resources and express our intentions. On the other side of movement is sensation. We constantly take in information about ourselves in relation to our surroundings. Awareness is a form of consciousness by which we notice our sensations and actions. When we interpret our sensations or actions then we are building upon awareness and generating stories for ourselves. Oftentimes stories are given to us such that we organize our awareness into shared structures. The stock market represents such a story: Wealth is generated and destroyed based on a shared belief that these numbers represent something real. Yoga is another version of such a story: Particular movements are given meaning through their practice. In both cases these belief structures have very real effects in our lives: We can gain or lose wealth that buys us food. We can gain or lose flexibility, strength, and connectedness with our bodies. I find that moving in the natural world connects me to a very deep story wired directly into my physical, emotional, and spiritual being. We are living systems, made up of living systems, and participating in the living system of Gaia. When I connect to Gaia by moving and sensing in wild places I build awareness of a life force larger than myself.

We as humans are not acting mindfully within Gaia. We seem largely unaware of how unsustainable our movements are as we create tremendous toxicity through the abuse of our natural resources. Meanwhile, I’d assert this way of life isn’t making us happy. Because we are part of Gaia, and capable of being sensitive to this shared consciousness, movement and awareness in our own bodies are the beginning of saving ourselves on Earth. I don’t think we’ll hurt Gaia that much overall—we’re just a flash in the timescale of Gaia’s aliveness. The possibility that we’ll exterminate ourselves is very real, though. I see it in each of us when we choose not to notice the signals our own bodies give us for healing, when we allow addictions to determine our actions, or when we fail to communicate honestly. I see it in each of us when we choose fearful stagnancy over movement and love for our bodies and beings. I am devoted to bringing myself and others to movement and awareness because I am devoted to humanity as part of Gaia. I am in your service.