There is certainly a pleasure in being of service, but how about a service in experiencing pleasure?  When I find pleasure in myself, and allow myself to inhabit it, can that serve you?  I believe it can and does so long as my pleasure is generous in nature, genuinely creating energy rather than taking it.  What boundaries make this possible?
 
Let’s acknowledge the elephant in regard to pleasure; it is strongly associated with sexuality.  I’ve written a bit in the past about sovereign sexuality; I think of this as an internal energetic relationship within myself.  There are a number of traditions of inner lovemaking that can generate pleasure without stimulating the genitals or even touching the body—we can love ourselves by just breathing.  This is one way to look at meditation, and also a way I approach movement.  Now you may define this kind of experience as distinctly non-sexual.  Yet, you and I can never actually know what the other is experiencing, and so concepts and words like sexuality, sensuality, or meditation are hugely relative.  What I believe is consistent, however, is the energy flow between us.  We can both perceive that.  If I am taking energy from you to get pleasure you will probably feel that.  If I am generating energy and making it available to you without attachment, you will likely feel that too.  We each meet the boundary between us with energetic intent.  This is where consent takes place.  There are conscious and unconscious layers of our interaction.  If I unconsciously do something different from what I consciously intend, that’s my shadow in control.  I have asked myself many times as I start speaking about these things about my unconscious intent:  Am I writing just to have you validate something in me, taking your energy for my own benefit?  Am I using the concepts of pleasure and sexuality to get attention?  There’s surely a layer of that, but it doesn’t feel primary.  I’m writing because I think there’s beauty to be found here in each of us.
 
So how is generating and experiencing pleasure of service?  Let’s hold this mystery together.  I investigate it a bit more in the attached video.  I welcome your feedback.
 
Please join me for BraveSpace Online this Wednesday June 15^th at 6pm Mountain Time.  We will explore non-verbal aspects of boundaries and consent.